Today I WILL Be A Mom!

Today, I vowed, I would be a Mom.  I know, I know, a funny vow for a Mom of three children.  What I mean is I will be a real mom as opposed to the glazed, half-dead woman who has been walking staggering around here lately just trying to exist and in some small way meet the physical needs of her family.  Just meeting your family's physical needs is not all there is to being a mom, though.

Let me go back.  This has been a hard week.  I think I would be in the loony-bin had it not been for my loving husband and kind Mother-in-law.  I'm not complaining...okay, maybe a little.  Its the kind of week that has had me up crying in the middle of the night when everyone else has been asleep, not just because I feel so sick but because of the discouragement of knowing that tomorrow I will wake and feel the same way and will try to survive and pray for night when I might be able to get a little sleep, if I'm not too sick.  Then there's the guilt.  The heavy weight of guilt I carry around knowing that little children need moms who meet their emotional needs as well as their physical needs and husbands need wives who can carry on a small conversation once in a while instead of just glassy-eyed nodding and mumbling, and look cheerful and happy once in a while when they return home from work.  There is a difference between tolerating your family and enjoying your family.  So I cry because of the overwhelming guilt I feel.

So today when I awoke I vowed that whatever I had to do, if I felt well at all, I would just be a mom-a real mom.  I bypassed the mountain of laundry in the laundry room and after three doses of three different medicines, beginning at 5:00 in the morning, was feeling pretty good.  I decided I would take as much of my precious medicine as I had to, even if I had none left for the next week.  (If you have strong opinions about women taking medicine while they're pregnant, just don't speak to me.)

And we've had a good day!  We took the children to Tuttle's Apple Farm where they played on the farm, took pony rides, picked three kinds of yummy apples and drank fresh apple cider.  We narrowly avoided the rain.  Then we spent the rest of the rainy afternoon inside, making pencil toppers, writing letters together, playing games, enjoying a rare treat of homemade pumpkin muffins (I don't do much baking right now), made some homemade applesauce and watched a movie together.

Yes, it was a good day!  I felt that I really enjoyed my family and connected with them.  And for one day, I was a mom, a real mom.  Tomorrow I will probably be back to laying around in a half-comatose state, but today was good.

And for that I will be thankful!

Inside the Mind of a 7 yr. Old Boy

Take a good look at this face.

This is the boy who has told me on more than one occasion, with a grin on his face and a twinkle in his eye, "Mom, I like to give you trouble!" 

There is something about boys that is so mischievous and fun.  The thing about boys is that you never know what they're thinking or what they are going to say or do.

Let me give you a few examples from the past week.

During a school lesson Breck asked, "Mom, how do we know that God created the world?"  This child NEVER asks easy questions. 

"Well, to start with you have to understand that everything in life has a beginning.  God is the only One who had no beginning.  So the world had to have a beginning."

"That's not true, Mom."  "A fence that goes in a circle has no beginning or ending."

At which point I picked him up and threw him out the window!

I decided one day this week to have a "kindness contest" to see which one of the children could be the kindest to each other, with the winner receiving a prize at the end of the day.  They both did admirably well and I was impressed.  But toward evening Breck came to me with his head drooping and said to me with a big sigh, "Mom, being kind is haaaard!"  He had managed to get through the day with only hitting his sister on the head with a shoe one time.  

We were studying in history about how pretty much the entire world thought that the end of the world would be 1000 AD.  (which by the way, if you're keeping track, didn't happen)  This brought on a discussion of the end of the world and how it really would end.  I told them the Bible says that the world will someday be burned with fire and God will make us a new Heaven and earth.

Fast forward to that evening:

Autumn comes in crying because her older brother with his newly-acquired information about the end of the world has informed her that God is going to burn her alive with the world, which as you can imagine, did not go over too well with her!! 

It is a pretty normal occurance for me and Leland to share a hug and kiss when he returns home from work.  I imagine this is pretty normal for many households.  Breck has watched us do this since he was born, but last night when he walked into the kitchen and found us hugging, he ran down the hallway yelling, "Autumn, do you want to see something dis.gust.ing?????  Mom and Dad are hugging!!" 

I guess we've reached that age.  Sometime soon I expect to hear him say that he won't sit by his sister at the dinner table because she has cooties!

Boys are a handful trying delightful!  They definitely keep things interesting, and I suspect they make God smile just a bit.

"School is Boring!" said the 5-yr. old

Autumn turned 5 years old this summer, thus ushering her into the school age world.  A week ago I asked her if she was excited about starting school this year.  "No," she said.  I was shocked!  How could she not be excited about that?  I thought all kids were excited about starting school for the first time.


"Why aren't you excited about starting school?" I asked.

"School is boring," was her answer.

Now I'm in a mental sweat.  As an avid homeschool Mom, I am adamant that school should NOT be boring.  School may be exciting, fun, challenging, even hard, but NEVER boring!!  So I calmly collect my emotions and cried, "How can you think school is boring when you've never even been to school yet??!!!"  Ok.  So I wasn't so calm. 

"I've heard the other kids talk," she said in a very bored, grown-up way, "and they all say its boring." 

I heaved a sigh of relief-that's all, not some deep-seated inhibition against school! 

"Well, you wait and see, school is fun and you're going to love it!"

Fast-forward to last night after our first day of school.  I'm sitting on her bed as she prepares to go to sleep.  "So, what did you think of your first day of school?" I asked. 

"It was fun!" she said, beaming.

Then, "You were right!"

My big school-girl!

Life's Lessons- Willingly or Unwillingly

My blog has been strangely silent the last few months, but trust me- I have VERY good reasons.  Our life went from cruising along at a somewhat moderate pace (as moderately as you can get with three kids) to a neck-breaking fast pace.  I won't try to catalogue everything that has happened since May as the post would be too long and too dull and boring for any of you to read.  Instead I'll share some things that I have learned over the past few months (willingly or unwillingly!)

About Weddings:

1. Planning a wedding is harder and takes more time than you think.
2. If you plan a wedding, you must be very flexible-because anything can change at the last moment: for instance an out-door wedding can suddenly become an in-door wedding, leaving you with 2 hr. to get everything ready for rehearsal!
3. I will never plan another wedding. No.  Not even under Chinese torture!

About Lightning:

1. Children should not play outside in the rain.
2. If you have to go out in the rain, try not to go into an open, unprotected field, walk around in water and hold up an umbrella like a lightning rod.
3. God is more powerful than lightning!
(If at this point you have no idea what I'm talking about, google "four children struck by lightning" and you'll soon see what I'm talking about.  If you go to Youtube you will probably find a video with Leland in it...his day in the sun) :)

About Flying:

1. If you wish to prevent your children from crying and making a scene, don't forget the gum! (I am validated as my kids were not the only ones crying)
2. Flying is boring for children, or so I was told many times!
3. Flying is not for pregnant women.
4. If a pregnant woman has to fly, she should NOT sit in the very last row where she feels every sway, bump and air turbulent!

About Camps:

1. Song Evangelism is hard work!!
2. After 40 services in a row your kids will hate church, as I overheard one emphatic little girl put it.
3. Nausea, vomiting, migraine headaches and dehydration are a bad combination-especially if you're the song evangelist.
4. Collapsing on the platform is undignified, unladylike and ungraceful and should be avoided if possible.
5. I will never give my kids pedialite.  Leland made me drink the stuff.  *sigh* Yes, I complied.   WELL! He's bigger than I am!!
6. If you notice scratches and lacerations on your child's stomach, it might be because they jumped out  a tabernacle window.
7. Camp food can actually be good, especially if you're in the state of Washington where they serve you thick, fresh salmon steaks!
8. "There's no place like home, Auntie Em."

About God:

1. God is not hindered by or worried about my weaknesses.
2. God is bigger than I think he is and is able to do more for me than I think. 

Lastly:

One grin and hug from a 15 month old who had to stay with Grandma and Grandpa is worth a fortune!!

Ok. Enough already!  (His Mommy really missed him.)

Contrasting Appearances

My kids had the priviledge of being angels today for about 60 minutes.  I think that was all they could handle.  Even before the costumes were off I could see the horns poking through in back of their halos. I'm sure they were chosen to be angels in our church's Christmas pageant ONLY because the costumes fit them and NOT because my children exibit angelic qualities.

Take a look at these pictures and you'll see what I mean.

Do these pictures look angelic, I ask you?

This or....

This.

 

Angels or.......

Not?   Do you see horns? I see horns.

Sweet and docile or....

 

Mischievious?

You decide.

Putting Away My Bullwhip

Lately, life has become a series of to-do lists.  My life has consisted of waking and then making a mad dash through my day to accomplish my list of things to do.  When I do (which is seldom), I feel good about myself.  I'm a good Teacher if I get school started on time and get through all my subjects.  I'm a good Mom if I teach my kids how to work hard and tell the truth.  I'm a good wife if I have the house clean, the clothes ironed and a nice supper on the table when Leland walks in the door. 

For instance, my list for today was:
Start school on time (ok, lets move to the next one)
Finish all Breck's school work
Dust the entire house
Make a nice supper
Make it to Bible Study (preferably on time)
(I know.  Not a big list.  But I have three little children, so give me a break here.)

But when those things don't happen, well... I have this bullwhip that I keep in my closet.  When the ironing doesn't get done...SLAP!   Supper didn't turn out well...SLAP!  I started school late...SLAP!  I didn't make that pumpkin pie my kids were begging me to make because I had too many other things to do...SLAP! SLAP!  I didn't write an e-mail to my dear Grandma...SLAP! SLAP! SLAP! 

After a while I feel bruised, frustrated, impatient, unloving, and........  Yeah.  You get the picture.  Not at all a pleasant person to be around.

Its at a time like this that God has a way of making his point very clearly.

I was having my devotions this morning when God suddenly spoke to me and said, "You are focusing on the WRONG THING!!!  Your focus should not be how much you can accomplish today; rushing through your to-do list.  Your focus should be serving Me with joy!"

Why is it that we always want to focus on DOING rather than BEING?!  God's ultimate goal is not for me to just read my Bible every day and go to church on Sunday and Bible study on Wednesday night.  Those things are good... don't get me wrong.  But what He really wants is re.la.tion.ship.  My husband doesn't need a perfect wife...he needs relationship!  My kids don't want a perfect Mom...they want relationship!  

WOW!! 

How liberating!

I don't have to be perfect!  I can put away my bullwhip! 

If I focus on relationships and serving God, I can still have joy when there are piles of laundry that need done. 

Who knew?

So today I choose joy.  And I hope my husband has something clean to wear to work tomorrow.

It Was A Wet, Soggy Vacation

It was a wet, soggy, misty, blustery, rainy vacation.  I know, I know, it was our fault for taking a vacation in Wisconsin in September.  What did we expect, right?  Well, the forcast the week before said it would be beautiful weather.  That was before it heard the Lindahl's were coming.   Then it turned into a generally yucky week.  Whoa.  50℉ feels REALLY cold when you've been used to 75-80℉ weather!  We did have one day that was not rainy and blowing and I think it even got up to 65℉!!

Thankfully we stayed in a very nice town home complete with fireplace and jacuzzi.  I can weather ANY storm with a jacuzzi, fireplace and latte!  Ooooohhhh yEEEEaaaahhh! (That's my Glenn Beck impersonation)

Oh, and steaks!  Huge. Steaks.  Steaks that Leland grilled to per.fec.tion.  Steaks that melted in your mouth.

 

Yeah, it wasn't so bad.

We sat around.

We drank lattes. (mostly Christy and I )

We watched movies.

We acted silly.

We read.

Grandma spent time with her newest grandbaby.

 We played nintendo games

It was nice to just sit around and do nothing.  That doesn't happen too often.  Oh, and I found out that we're pretty talented at doing nothing. 

What Its All About

It was 8:30 in the evening.  We had just made a 10 hr. trip home from Wisconsin where we had spent the previous week in a much-needed vacation.  The kids had been put in bed, all except for Braden who was screaming his lungs out at having to be put in bed after being in a car seat ALL day.  I was trying to get things unpacked as we had Sunday Worship the next morning.  I felt VERY frazzled as I tried in vain to get Braden to settle down. 

Braden had just drifted off to sleep in my arms while I was sitting in the recliner when I heard a soft, "Mom, Mom."  I groaned inwardly as I debated what to do.  Do I try to talk to Breck from in here and risk waking Braden or do I try to sloowly get up and go into the room without waking him?  I finally decided on the latter and made it into Breck's room. 

"What do you need, honey?"  I was not prepared for his answer.  I was expecting, "I need a drink of water,"  "I want a story on,"  "I can't feel my fan".....you know, the usual stuff kids come up with right when they're supposed to be going to sleep.  

Instead, he looked at me and said, "I want to pray."

"Okay.  What do you want to pray about?"

"I want to ask Jesus to come into my heart."

"I thought you already asked Him to come into your heart."  He had prayed this prayer when he was three yr. old and he had always affirmed that Jesus had saved him then.

"I did.  But I'm not sure that I meant it and I just want to be sure."

Wow!  I helped him pray and rededicate his life to Jesus that night.  I also explained to him that its always okay to pray and make sure that our relationship with Jesus is in the right place.


Sometimes being a mom can be a tough job... no, not sometimes- most of the time.  You teach and train and discipline and nurture until you feel worn out emotionally.  Sometimes you wonder if its doing any good or if you're doing a good enough job.

Its moments like these that remind me what its all about.  Its about getting our kids to heaven.  Its about making a difference in their lives.  And its worth every emotionally-draining day.  Its worth every frazzled moment.  Its worth every moment that you have spent in your bed at night crying to God to help you know how to do this!  Its worth everything to be a mom. 

I know by the calendar its not Mother's Day, but then again, maybe it is. 

Happy Mother's Day, my friends.

Of Dragons and Fair Ladies

Once upon a time there was a fair maiden who was captured by a dragon. A brave knight took on the dragon, slew him and rescued the princess and they all lived happily ever after. The end.


The Princess


The Dragon (Don't be fooled by meek and mild-looking Tigger-he can be very fierce!)



The Knight



A fierce battle ensues


The Dragon is slain



The Princess honors the Knight who saved her life



The victorious conqueror!

Shameless Gushing!!

There are few things more nauseating than a brand-new mother. They all think THEIR baby is the cutest, the smartest, the most cuddly, and on and on and on... You know what I'm talking about. Everyone else is going, "Yea, yea, yea...he looks like all the rest!" Grandparents are the only ones who appreciate this.

So far I have tried to refrain from gushing about my baby and making everyone around me sick. But a Mom can only do what she can do...I mean, give me a break here! So if you have a weak stomach you might want to jump to the next blog because this is going to be shameless!! I had some pictures of my darling baby boy that were simply begging to be posted. So at the risk of being completely annoying...here they are.



Laughing at something ...who knows what? Probably at one of his parents.


Taking a bath



Watching life go by


And lying around some more...


Boy, I wish I could lie around this much!


I know he was trying to quote Shakespeare



"Mommy, I love you!" (I told you this was going to be nauseating.)
Alright, that's all (for now). Is anybody still here...... Hey... where did you all go?